Ladies and gentlemen, how are you feeling tonight? This is Kevin Hart, and I'm coming to you live from the Wynn casino in Las Vegas! Now, I know what you're thinking: "What's Kevin Hart doing here? He's not old enough to gamble!" But let me tell you something, I may be small, but I got big dreams. And one of those dreams is to win big at the craps table.

But let's talk about the Wynn, shall we? This place is fancy, huh? I mean, I feel like I need a tuxedo just to walk through the lobby. And don't even get me started on the rooms. I mean, my room is bigger than my apartment back in Philly. I don't know what to do with all this space. I feel like I should set up a mini-golf course or something.

But here's the thing about the Wynn: it's not just fancy, it's freakin' expensive. I mean, I saw the price of a bottle of water in the minibar and I thought I was gonna have a heart attack. I could buy a whole case of water for that price back home. And don't even get me started on the room service. I ordered a grilled cheese sandwich and they brought me a sandwich with gold flakes on it. I mean, who does that? I'm not a rapper, I just want a sandwich.

And speaking of food, have you guys been to the buffet here? It's like a food orgy. I mean, there's lobster, there's sushi, there's prime rib. I don't even know where to start. I feel like I need a strategy, like I'm going into battle or something. And don't even get me started on the desserts. I swear, I saw a guy trying to fit an entire chocolate fountain in his mouth.

But the thing about the Wynn is, it's not just about the food and the rooms. It's about the gambling. And let me tell you, I've been hitting the tables hard. I mean, I'm not gonna lie, I've lost a lot of money. Like, a lot a lot. But it's all good, because I'm gonna win it back. And if I don't, well, I'm just gonna have to sell my car and move into my mom's basement.

But let me tell you something about the people at the Wynn. They're crazy. I mean, I've seen people yelling at slot machines like they're arguing with their ex. And the dealers at the tables? They're like robots. I mean, I asked one of them if they were human and they just gave me a blank stare. I think they might be aliens.

And let's talk about the drinks here. I mean, they're not messing around. I ordered a vodka tonic and they brought me a glass that was like the size of a fishbowl. And the ice cubes? They're like the size of my fist. I'm pretty sure they're trying to get me drunk so I'll spend more money.

But let's talk about the shows here at the Wynn. They're incredible. I mean, I saw Le Reve and it was like I was watching a dream come to life. And the performers? They're like acrobats on steroids. I mean, I saw a guy do a triple backflip into a pool. And he did it like it was nothing. Meanwhile, I can barely touch my toes.

But here's the thing about the shows at the Wynn: they're not cheap. I mean, I had to take out a second mortgage on my house just to afford a ticket.